Happy Thanksgiving to my American friends!
I may be your neighbour to the North with the smokin’ hot Prime Minister, but I am secretly envious of your patriotism, commercialism, and free-refills policy.
I wanted to write a brief little shout-out to the country that’s given me so much blog love this past year, and is home to some of my favourite people in the entire world.
You’ve had one hell of a year, Girl. You’ve got so much to be thankful for, namely the legalization of Gay marriage that has thwarted my plans to strike a deal with a closeted gay male from a Republican family, marry for a green card, and then amicably divorce within two years just to get his family to leave him alone at Thanksgiving dinner. Now it’s back to the drawing board, and I’ll have to sell myself the old fashioned way: On Craigslist.
I don’t think you understand my severe dislike of Canadian winters and the lengths I would go to for a chance to live in your beautiful Southern States. Lingering Confederate ideals? I can’t hear them from the sound of my boat on the ocean while I’m getting some sun at the sand bar on the weekend. You’re lucky to live in a country with diverse climates.
NEVER TAKE THAT FOR GRANTED.
This Thanksgiving, I hope you count your blessings, not calories.