I say it every week but…. TGIF!
We made it!
I’m so glad it’s the weekend. I’ve been extremely tired this week. So tired that as I was doing my make-up yesterday morning, I couldn’t figure out why the cap to my concealer wouldn’t fit back on. It took several tries before I finally realized my error.
I had a good, maniacal, sleep deprived laugh at myself.
Why am I so tired?
Funny you should ask. I’ve been on the GO lately. I spent almost all of August housesitting for family and friends. This past weekend, I went all out to host a Bachelorette Party for one of my best friends.
*Warning, if you’re under the age of 18 please be advised that you’ll see some phallic images after the cut. I’m not your Mom, so I don’t care what you see. Just giving you a heads up. Pun intended.
1. Kit’s A-Cock-Alypse
My friend Kit is getting married September 5th, in an intimate backyard wedding. Kit opted out of having a wedding party, so I took it upon myself, the group’s resident sass-mouth to plan her Bachelorette Party.
The Acockalypse was an idea that came to Kit and I when we discussed her impending marriage and the idea of spending her life dedicated to one man. It’s the end of times for her single days. Lo and behold a theme was born.
We began the night with some snacks, drinks and white-girl twerking before heading into town to park our butts at a bar and feed the bride to be with shots and nachos. Low key, right?
Kit’s not a party girl. I was under strict instructions not to hire any strippers and I happily obliged. We ended the night with candy, a play doh penis making contest and a marathon of Sex and the City episodes at four in the morning.
2. Wildest Dreams Video – Taylor Swift
EEEE! I can’t wait. Wildest Dreams is my favourite song off of Swift’s album 1989, and this weekend the music video will premiere during the MTV Video Music Awards. I don’t normally watch those award shows anymore, because…well I’m almost 30, don’t know who half the people are, and have other shit to do. But this year, I’ll be by my computer waiting patiently for the video to be uploaded.
3. Miley Cyrus on Jimmy Kimmel
Whatever. I’m kind of over this chick, but Jimmy Kimmel is looking F-I -N-E FINNNNNNE these days.
Hello, Mommy like the scruff!
4. Jennifer Lawrence and Amy Schumer penning a screenplay
Maybe it’s just me, but I’m really put off when really successful band together to be super successful together. It’s like high school. I just have an aversion to paying attention to popular kids. We get it, you’re blonde and funny. Although I argue that Jennifer Lawrence isn’t THAT funny, and is just really pretty so people are like “she’s funny for a pretty girl.”
Will I see the movie?
I….guess so? I don’t know. I’m really grumpy and PMS-y today. Ask me tomorrow or in like. 4 days.
5. The Newsroom
I’m on a binge and I can’t stop.
I’ve seen almost all Season 1 of the Newsroom in four days. The HBO drama is written by Aaron Sorkin (powerhouse writer behind The West Wing) and stars Jeff Daniels as famous evening news anchor, Will McAvoy.
I’ve never had journalist or broadcast ambitions, but shit kids. This show gives me a second hand high off of the adrenaline pulsating through the fictional office.
Also, I want to BE Olivia Munn who plays economist reporter Sloane Sabbath.