It’s almost my birthday, and Kim Kardashian isn’t coming (but Ed Sheeran might be)

I turn 28 in thirteen days. 13. 1-3.

While I’m usually knee deep in an annual existential crisis, this year I’ve got recent love troubles and several weddings to distract me from my aging ovaries. I’ve decided to keep my birthday low-key, and have invited a few of my closest friends for patio drinks at a trendy-ish Hamilton restaurant as I edge closer to the abyss that is thirty. Given what’s been going on lately, I think having my nearest and dearest (vodka and chocolate) as well as my friends surrounding me is the ticket to a happy birthday.

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Someone who didn’t get the memo of a low-key birthday is Myleeza, a Kim Kardashian super fan from New Orleans who recently celebrated her 21st birthday WITH the reality star. That’s right. Kimmy flew to NOLA to hang with her biggest fan.  Um, a birthday with Mrs. Kardashian-West, and in-utero future West baby?

That’s pretty f*cking cool.

Which leads me to ask you the following question…

If you could have any celebrity attend your birthday party, who would it be?

There’s only one person I would like to come to my birthday this year: Ed Sheeran.

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Here’s why I need some Ed in my life:

Homeboy’s good looking, loves to drink, won’t judge me when I inevitably get a little sloppy, and looks like someone who would say, “I like older women, and yes, I’ll hold your hair back if you throw up at the end of the night. Why don’t you kick off your shoes and dance barefoot in the street, just watch out for crack pipes.”  (This is Hamilton, after all).

*swoon*

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My guest list this year might be void of a Gingerbread-babe, but a girl can dream, right?

Tell me who would make the guest list at your birthday bash!

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7 comments

  1. This is just cruel. There is no possible way I could narrow down my celebrity guest list. Do I want to have fun? Or do I just want to creepily stare at them? Anna Kendrick seems like a down to earth, non-judgmental choice but I think Taylor Swift would give great presents. Zac Efron has that perpetual frat boy vibe and seems like he knows the best places for greasy fries for the after party. Nick Jonas? Bruno Mars? Bey and Jay? BRITNEY SPEARS??!

    Lawwwd. I need a life.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Happy *almost* birthday! Haha, Ed Sheeran sounds like the perfect choice for you! He had that adorable, boy-ish charm, but also looks like he can handle a lot of liquor!

    I suppose a celebrity that I would like at my birthday bash would have to be Zoie Palmer, just because she’s Canadian and gorgeous. Maybe Joseph Gordon-Levitt for his adorableness as well. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. hmmmm…thats super hard to pick!!
    i feel like jlaw would be fun! dance weird. make raunchy jokes. eat all the food.
    maybe chris pratt! dance weird. make raunchy jokes…eat all the…food…and stare at his abs.
    maybe karaoke?!
    lol

    Like

  4. Oh my gosh only one?!? Well I guess it would have to be TSwift then. I mean, she clearly throws AMAZING parties, and since she’s coming, I’m sure her whole posse (Ed included) would come with her right? It would be the party of the century.

    Liked by 1 person

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