On this morning’s blog roll, I came across a post from People StyleWatch about the new celebrity trend of wearing a one piece swimsuit as a bodysuit.
Here’s the thing. I grew up in the 90’s when it was trendy to wear bodysuits with jeans. They had little snaps at the crotch, similar to a baby’s onesie for easy access TO PEE (pervert). I had all different colours and patterns but I was also seven years old and flat as a board.
I look at this trend and think two things:
1. If I had to pee, do I have to get completely naked or just pull away the suit to the side like real lady like?
I’m incredibly lazy. I don’t wear rompers because I don’t like the thought of having to disrobe whenever I go to the bathroom. I have also, on many occasion, substituted bikini bottoms for underwear when it was laundry day (it adds some bulk under the clothes, but that’s ok). If I wore a one piece as a shirt & underwear, I’m guaranteed to have a mishap in the loo.
2. Unless there’s a built in over the shoulder boulder holder, this trend ain’t gonna fly.
I doubt Selena Gomez and Kylie Jenner are wearing bras with this trend – and unless you’re 23 and 17 years old respectively, you’re going to need a shit ton more support for your boobies, because gravity is real. Late twenties boob and early twenties boob are completely different altitudes. Not to mention the obvious problem of one being bigger than the other. I’ve gone braless once in my life and I kept having to wrap my arm casually across my waist, like I was nursing a broken rib just to make it look like my boobs were on a level playing field. Seriously.
I’ll leave this trend for the hipsters with zero percent body fat and A-cups, who are OK with publicly undressing in a bathroom stall or are one of those weirdoes who are afraid to use public bathrooms and just hold it until they get home.
I’ll stick with bras, underpants, bikinis and loose flowing shirts, thank you very much.